Need to know
- Zee
- Sebring, Florida, United States
- Hello, my name is Elizabeth but all my friends call me Zee. You have entered and are most likely reading my blog (duh, if you're here then of course you are) I'll share some info about myself with you then. I'm 18 years old and I live in Florida. I'm homeschooled so life is a complete bore, especially in this little town. But music helps me get though each and every day. Like all my favorite Jrock and Kpop bands. B2ST, SHINee, SS501, DBSK, U-Kiss, 2PM, LM.C, The GazettE, Alice Nine, An Cafe, ScReW, SuG, VAMPS, and Zoro. It's been my dream since I was little to visit Korea, Japan, and China one day. And I pray, after I go to collage I will see them all. Well I'm not really sure what else to write, so I guess that's it Hwag-in Domo Arigato Zaijian! ^.^
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
is this REALLY how I'm going to get into Japan?
My parents have been fighting and I have a feeling they won't be together long. My mother keeps saying "if I had the money I take you and we'd go to Japan"...is this REALLY how I'm going to get into Japan? A bit of a fucked up way if you ask me, but I guess the future is unknown so I will do my part for now and put my nose in the books to learn Japanese, that way at least one of us would be able to understand it lol.
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Guddonaito!
The story is coming along great, I'm halfway done! my hand is aching from typing though >< So I'm off to bed, or practice some dance lol. So Guddonaito! ^.^
New Header!!! YAY!!!
Ok well my new header is done, as you can see. I love the little chibi girl. This is what it looked like BEFORE I colored it.
and then of course, after
Yay! and now I'm off to work on my story again because now I have ANOTHER one-shot idea as well lol
Saturday, February 26, 2011
その日の最初のポスト- First post of the day
Off to work on the picture once more, I didn't get a chance to work on it again last night. I was staying up to wait for my bro to get home (he had went out to the bar) sadly so did my mom, so as soon as he got home I had to get off V.V
Then after my picture is done, I shall work on my new header for my blog. lol Stevie made a new one and inspired me to do so as well. (that and mine was a quickly made one in paint lol)
Then I have an idea for something, and I have the green fabric to do so lol
I'm going to make one of the ambea plushies like Maya has here
Then after my picture is done, I shall work on my new header for my blog. lol Stevie made a new one and inspired me to do so as well. (that and mine was a quickly made one in paint lol)
Then I have an idea for something, and I have the green fabric to do so lol
I'm going to make one of the ambea plushies like Maya has here
Hai! lol, well I'm off to get started. Sore iko!
Friday, February 25, 2011
Random scribbles
-Sigh- it's dark now, and I'm utterly board!
Unknowing of just WHAT to do X___X
Twin-chan just got on, Niii I will talk to her! It's fun to talk about anything and everything with twin-chan, she makes my world happier. It was funny last night, I had been obsessed with k-pop boys but always felt like something just wasn't right, ya know, like there was a feeling I wanted but I wasn't getting it from them.
But now I have it again, and it was because of Twin-chan randomly saying who I should marry and then sending me a picture of Maya-chan.
Like I said last night, it's very odd......but pleasant, that no matter how many guys I obsess over, I always end up falling back into the thoughts of my lollipop king Maya.
Heh, twin-chan did make another picture of her and Justin Beiber.....maybe I should make another of me and Masa ^.^
Unknowing of just WHAT to do X___X
Twin-chan just got on, Niii I will talk to her! It's fun to talk about anything and everything with twin-chan, she makes my world happier. It was funny last night, I had been obsessed with k-pop boys but always felt like something just wasn't right, ya know, like there was a feeling I wanted but I wasn't getting it from them.
But now I have it again, and it was because of Twin-chan randomly saying who I should marry and then sending me a picture of Maya-chan.
Like I said last night, it's very odd......but pleasant, that no matter how many guys I obsess over, I always end up falling back into the thoughts of my lollipop king Maya.
Heh, twin-chan did make another picture of her and Justin Beiber.....maybe I should make another of me and Masa ^.^
Entertainment in my town
Ok well I'll tell you JUST how boring my town IS!
My mom and I had to go to the store today, one reason was to pick up Henry's blood pressure pills.
Ok well 1st off, there was a line from HELL! like it stretched all the way into the main aisle. Ok so mom was in line, I was sitting on the bench, and this old man with a basket (we'll call him Phil, idk what his real name was XD) and his wife (we'll call her Kate). were trying to get by, so they said "excuse me" to this other old guy (we'll call him Ted...random names lol) and so Ted grabbed Phil's basked and pushed it away and I believe he said
"The end of the line is back there" I guess Ted though Phil and Kate were line jumpers XD. Ok well at first I thought maybe they were old buddies ya know, just playing around. But then Phil said "Excuse me!" in a very pissed off tone, so Ted moved forward reluctantly and said
"You could have just went the fuck around"
But then Phil said
"Or you could have just fucking moved"
Then Kate chimed in with.
"You didn't have to be a ass you crappy ass old man" to Ted
ROFL, I thought we were going to have a seniors fight break out in the middle of Wal-Mart. Mom looked back at me and I was trying soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo hard not to just start busting out laughing. I giggled some but then just put my headphones back in and listened to LM.C-Space Wannbiez.
Is it pretty bad that THIS is the only entertainment in my town?? DX lol
My mom and I had to go to the store today, one reason was to pick up Henry's blood pressure pills.
Ok well 1st off, there was a line from HELL! like it stretched all the way into the main aisle. Ok so mom was in line, I was sitting on the bench, and this old man with a basket (we'll call him Phil, idk what his real name was XD) and his wife (we'll call her Kate). were trying to get by, so they said "excuse me" to this other old guy (we'll call him Ted...random names lol) and so Ted grabbed Phil's basked and pushed it away and I believe he said
"The end of the line is back there" I guess Ted though Phil and Kate were line jumpers XD. Ok well at first I thought maybe they were old buddies ya know, just playing around. But then Phil said "Excuse me!" in a very pissed off tone, so Ted moved forward reluctantly and said
"You could have just went the fuck around"
But then Phil said
"Or you could have just fucking moved"
Then Kate chimed in with.
"You didn't have to be a ass you crappy ass old man" to Ted
ROFL, I thought we were going to have a seniors fight break out in the middle of Wal-Mart. Mom looked back at me and I was trying soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo hard not to just start busting out laughing. I giggled some but then just put my headphones back in and listened to LM.C-Space Wannbiez.
Is it pretty bad that THIS is the only entertainment in my town?? DX lol
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Feeling better, my eyes and Kemushi are dry
Well I'm feeling much better now. The ache is gone, for how long I'm not sure, but it's good to feel at peace.
Twin-chan thank you so so so so so much! I think I may understand now, though true it may and will hurt not having a bf, but you're right, I'm only 17, I'm still young. and as you said, boys are like the cheese-it commercials, they need time to mature...XD I still can't believe you compared boys to cheese LMFAO!!!! but that's why I love you twin-chan ^.^ . So I guess my soulmate will not come today. Tomorrow, the day after that, and the day after , ect ect that is still up in the air, but I will go on with my life while I wait. And not to mention Jrock bands, and K-pop bands with their...hot...sexy GODNESS helps ^.^ LOL and plus now I have something to do to pass the time, learn the SHINee-Hello, and Miss A-Bad Girl, Good Girl dances for the next time you visit! XD
So I will wait til boys and I are older...though...I wonder if I dated an older guy would he already be mature???? LOL sorry Twin-chan, you should have known I'd come out with something like that LOL, after all most of my favorite Jrockers are in their 30s XD
But I'm feeling better, my eyes and Kemushi are dry.
Twin-chan thank you so so so so so much! I think I may understand now, though true it may and will hurt not having a bf, but you're right, I'm only 17, I'm still young. and as you said, boys are like the cheese-it commercials, they need time to mature...XD I still can't believe you compared boys to cheese LMFAO!!!! but that's why I love you twin-chan ^.^ . So I guess my soulmate will not come today. Tomorrow, the day after that, and the day after , ect ect that is still up in the air, but I will go on with my life while I wait. And not to mention Jrock bands, and K-pop bands with their...hot...sexy GODNESS helps ^.^ LOL and plus now I have something to do to pass the time, learn the SHINee-Hello, and Miss A-Bad Girl, Good Girl dances for the next time you visit! XD
So I will wait til boys and I are older...though...I wonder if I dated an older guy would he already be mature???? LOL sorry Twin-chan, you should have known I'd come out with something like that LOL, after all most of my favorite Jrockers are in their 30s XD
But I'm feeling better, my eyes and Kemushi are dry.
Damn it I just want someone to care!
I'm logging on to myspace to see if my ex Matt replied to our message yet...my EX, is this what my heart has done to me??? I cling on to the boy who I broke up with because HE was too clingy but somehow seems to be the only boy who cares??? I saw Satoru's (my ex online "bf") newest profile picture today. random shot of him I guess, but I somehow wanted to cry, just break down and cry. I cling to Kemushi (my stuffed caterpillar) for comfort. Is this going to be my whole life??? alone...crying over the "what could have beens"...feeling like I just want to die. It hurts,it's like an ache in my chest, not really piercing, but a consent throbbing. is the throbbing my heart? is it it's beating? if it is, I guess you can really feel heartache.I wonder why I was put on this Earth, as I wrap Kemushi's 6 legs around my torso, the presser doesn't ease the pain, but a hug feels good, whether it's from a stuffed animal or not. As I write this I can feel the tears coming to the surface, I hate this feeling, more then I hate anything. I just wanna scream, yell at the world, fall to my knees and cry my heart out until I totally disappear. Stevie says she wants a baby, but that's not what I want. I just wanna know there's a guy out there who loves me, who cares about how I feel, who will call me up in the middle of the day, if we can't hang out, just to tell me he loves me. I want a guy who will kiss me and hug me, and with each kiss and each hug, I can feel just how much love he holds for me. Damn it I just want someone to care! The tears are falling now, soaking Kemushi's plush little body, and my vision is getting blurred. I just don't get it, how long do I have to wait? how much do I have to cry? what do I have to do? how many times do I have to get my heart broken by boys who show interest, promise things, and then just stop talking to me! with no reason, how long do I have to feel like there's something fucked up with me, before I find my soulmate???? I'm so afraid that once I meet him, my heart will be too badly bruised, my trust will have been shredded, and my being will be too microscopic to allow him to heal me.At the end of the day, I have to retreat to my small lonely bed, sure I'll cuddle with Kemushi, and hopefully dream a good dream, but what about tomorrow? as soon as my eyes open, the pain will start again. I hear all these girls, complaining about their guys, I just wanna slap them, and then say "be fucking grateful you HAVE a guy to go on dates with! to kiss you! to hug you! to most likely cuddle with at night!" right in their shocked faces. It's true, a lot of people say I'm hateful towards all of the couples that I see...and maybe it's true, but I can tell you think. I'm not hateful...I'm lonely. I act mean towards them so they won't see the hurt and sadness in my eyes. But now I'm starting to repeat myself I guess, oh well, this is how I feel.I hug Kemushi again as I try not to cry anymore. I will try to hold on, but I'm not sure how much longer I can, I've noticed the pain is getting worse, and it seems to be consent now, day in and day out. But I guess this blog thing was a good idea, even though no one will ever read this...but...I feel like maybe someone will, and it feels good to have someone really listen for a change.
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